Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Videotaping

Have you ever noticed how when people know they're being videotaped they automatically start acting really dorky? What in the WORLD possesses them to do this? As soon as someone holding a camera says, "Hey guys, say hi to my folks back home," they are either crossing their eyes, making fish faces, or walking and talking like Frankenstein. What about a video camera does this to people? What are they thinking? It's like:

Well normally I don't have a fish face and look this ridiculous. But let me act like this when I'm being *taped* so that it's permanent, and lot of other people I don't know may see it.

Uh sure, yeah, makes sense. Why don't they just act NORMAL and say hi to the camera?

See I'm the other way around. I'm so dorky ALL the time (my friends can so attest to this :) ). That's why I don't act that way in front of the camera. See that way, there's no record of it and my friends have no way of proving what a nut job I really am if they ever need to. It's my method of madness, (meaning it only causes them madness and not others).

Muaaahahahahahahaha!!!

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Spelling bee

So I watched Spellbound yesterday. And it got me thinking, why do we have spelling bees? I mean not only do we now have spell-check on the computer, but before computers they had dictionaries didn't they? So what is so great about being able to say that you can spell better than someone else? I can't really spell and it hasn't held me back. And it's really the luck of the draw during the spelling bee isn't it? You could know all the words that the folks ahead of you spell, and then get up to the mike and not know the word they give you. Months and months of studying out the window, just like that. And they give such ODD words, words we probably don't even have to know how to spell!

And why is it called a spelling "bee"?

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Chipotle

Chipotle is a great place isn't it? I love their burriotos!



Now for once, that was NOT sarcastic. :)



But what's up with their take-out bags looking like gift bags? It seems like a lot of restaurants are doing that now, and I don't care for it much. Now you think I'm crazy, but I think there's something to be said for keeping some things as they are for old times' sake. There's a certain *feel* that comes with bags. I mean think about it, big brown paper bags without handles say groceries, big plastic bags say shopping at a department store, smaller plastic bags say take-out food, and smaller, stiffer "bags" with handles say a gift bag. When I get take-out, I want it to *feel* like I'm taking out food rather than feeling like I'm carrying a gift for someone.


I mean would it be the same to pour cereal out of a bag instead of out of a box, or to have Chinese take-out be in bowls instead of boxes?

Bumper Stickers

Bumper stickers are so stupid aren't they? Well, and they especially are when they say something like "I love my beagle." Well that's great lady, and I love my mom, sister, friends, my cat....but you don't see me putting stickers that say all that do you? I mean, what possesses someone to deface their car with something like that? Shouldn't we be a bit more discriminatory with messages that we permanently put on our cars? I can appreciate more the ones that at least communicate some sort of message that advocates for social change. Or give me something *interesting* to read and think about while at a red light. Not how much you love something for crying out loud.

Here's a bumper sticker for ya: "I love people who don't put cheesy bumper stickers on their cars."

Monday, April 14, 2008

If you will...

That's *another* term I don't hear enough of. "Let's take the cat, or the feline, if you will..."

No, I won't.

I mean it's such a STUPID expression! Why do we bother saying it? Are we going to retract the phrase if the person answers with "No, I won't."?

I think if we cut out such phrases from our speech, we'd probably save a lot of time and energy.

Protein

So here's another cliche I'd like to comment on: lately I've been hearing too much of, "Well, I need protein" (in the context of trying to plan a vegetarian meal.) Or I also hear, "You know, if I don't get it, my body really craves the protein after a while." And it's usually meat-eaters who say this.

Reeeallllly? You don't say! Cuz you know, just cuz I'm vegetarian my body doesn't have a need for protein at all! My muscles just reproduce themselves. Sucks to be you...

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Presidential or personal?

So I guess John McCain is now touring parts of the country that are significant to his personal life. Because he wants the country to see more of his personal side.

Are you frickin' kidding me? I mean do we reaaaaaaaaaaallllly need to see more personal aspects of people in politics? Hasn't it become more of a soap opera of sorts? Who shagged whom, who showed whom their thong, who slept with a prostitute, yada yada yada. And one candidate here has his ENTIRE family on his poster. So what, having a big family (I thought only he was running and not his whole family) makes him a better candidate? Doesn't it just mean that he knows how to have sex a lot? He can't even speak to his parenting ability because his wife is raising the kids while he's running for office.

I mean if we want drama or to know more personal stories, we can watch tv or read a good book. Heaven forbid we instead expect leaders to give us LEADERSHIP. At the very least they should provide more interesting drama, then maybe I'd be more motivated to keep up with the news.

So you don't want to hear about MY drama, how I am or am not getting laid by a worth it or not-so-worth-it bloke? Well at least I'm not expected to develop a reputation that worthy of being presidential.

Wait, so I COULD run for president...