Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Breakfast

So if we sometimes have breakfast for dinner, then how come we never have dinner for breakfast?

Monday, March 16, 2009

Clapping

So in this acting class I'm taking, our instructor says that "we always clap for each other" when presenting. I mean I get that it's about showing support for each other because everyone's getting out of their comfort zone some, it can be nerve-racking, yada yada yada. But if we ALWAYS clap, then doesn't it lose its meaning? Shouldn't we clap only if the performance brings out clapping in us? Shouldn't the performer know in some way if they suck?

Don't worry, I've thought this through. You don't think I'd say such a thing without thinking through how I'd react if nobody clapped for me now did you? This is what I'd do:

Sit on the ground, take off my shoes and socks, flash my toe and say "fuck you melonfarmers! You think you coulda done that better??? Come up and prove it! I bet my CAT can act better than you!"

Ahem, k, I'm done.

:)

Sweat pants

Okay, so you know how women shouldn't wear pants that show their camel toes? Well for a similar type of reason is why I think men should not be allowed to wear sweat pants. You don't wanna see my camel toe? Then what the hell makes you think I want to see the little ding dong ringing with every move you make?

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Asshole

I'm questioning why the word "asshole" became such an insult. Because I really enjoy the morning dump. And during that time I really appreciate my asshole. Actually, a lot of insults deal with the most basic part of living. So perhaps it's our subconscious telling the person that we, in actuality, really care for them. So here are some suggested responses:

-Asshole!
Gee, thanks!
-Go fuck yourself!
I will, and that'll help me to feel better, thanks for the suggestion!
-Butthead
Aw thanks-I didn't think Iwas smart enough to have 2 heads on my body!