Saturday, August 26, 2006

Bathing suits

Okay so we don't want to show our underwear to just anyone, but we'll pretty much wear our bathing suits in front of anyone? I mean, these days, bathing suits are such that they cover less than underwear sometimes. So I'll walk around my boyfriend's house in a bathing suit where his friends can see me, but I won't walk around in my underwear? Why not? My underwear covers just as much as the bathing suit does. Hell a towel covers more than the bathing suit does too. And these days you have THONG bathing suits. Sheesh.

We should just go swimming in underwear. That'll save the hassle of shopping for a suit and will also save money. And it will probably make my boyfriend happier too.

Love seat

Why is a love seat called a "love" seat? One, there's not enough room to make love on it. Two, chances are, people who own a furniture set that includes a love seat probably have been together long enough to where they wouldn't even want to sit together on the "love seat."

So there you have it, it needs a new name.

Friday, August 25, 2006

Bathroom

Have you noticed how many people put magazines in their bathrooms? And not like 1 or 2, but there will be racks with like 10. I mean come ON, how much time are you planning on spending in the bathroom? You just want to sit on the toilet and read for a half an hour? Why not wait to go to the bathroom until you actually have to go, and then you can read more comfortably on your bed or the sofa? I must be crazy but hanging out in the bathroom is not quite my thing, sheesh.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Office Space

Have you seen the movie Office Space? Well, I experienced it yesterday even though I'm NOT working in a cubicle environment anymore. I have just a 6-mile commute to school and it took me 35 minutes, even with avoiding the freeway during morning traffic. There was a guy walking on the sidewalk who was going faster than me!

Then, something happened to me which I do not believe is in the movie. At a staff meeting, some people were sounding to me like Charlie Brown's mother (add sound effect here). I SWEAR, I cannot stand people who like to hear themselves talk. They think they're the shit and don't stick to the agenda. All they had to do was introduce themselves, describe their position, and give a brief description of their work experience and strengths. I swear these people were going on and on about so much more, to the point where I think I checked-out until I had to introduce myself.

For those who like to hear themselves talk: why don't you guys just record yourself once so that you can listen to yourself on tape whenever you want? That way you don't waste our time!

Sunday, August 20, 2006

DVDs

I'm sorry, but I still don't see the benefit of DVDs over VHS tapes. First off, of all the DVDs I've watched, only ONE has had coming attractions. That is part of the fun of watching a movie, is seeing trailers. And, last night, the DVD we watched had the previews at the beginning, but then you don't really have the option of stopping the DVD and fast-forwarding through them if you want, the way you can with a tape. Yes, you can fast forward, or "search" as it's called, but it's still not that fast and you have to watch while it's doing it, as opposed to just stopping a tape and watching the counter while it fast-forwards. Oh yeah, and then at the end of the movie, the DVD kept freezing and skipping and so we had to start over, watch the damn trailers again, then skip the scene that had problems, and select the next scene. With tapes, you don't have the freezing and skipping problem, now do you? I can't tell you how many times I've had that problem with DVDs I've rented.

Second, many, even comedies, do not provide the option of viewing outtakes. Watching outtakes is a large part of the fun for me in watching anything. So if the DVD offers a menu of things to choose from, then WHY don't many offer the option of watching outtakes? What's the point of technology if it doesn't provide what it is perfectly capable of providing?

Third, not only are these two things often not options with DVDs, but they almost ALWAYS provide an option to view deleted scenes! Now if you notice, the deleted scenes usually suck and at least I anyway, don't get through watching them all. Well duh, they were DELETED scenes. They obviously for whatever reason were not kept in the movie. Otherwise they would not be deleted and they'd be IN the movie. So if they were deleted, why do we want to watch them? They need to be deleted from the DVD too for crying out loud.

Oh I get it, owning something just BECAUSE it's available in stores is a status symbol. Everyone HAS to have the latest technology without thinking about if there is truly a benefit. Fine, go ahead and make fun of me for still using my VCR and viewing my tapes, but remember that I have less of a chance of my movie getting interrupted.

Monday, August 14, 2006

Condiments

Okay, I thought ketchup and mustard are found together, like salt and pepper. But I guess not cuz these days I only find ketchup on the table in restaurants. Ketchup? Why ketchup? Mustard is so much better. Ketchup is just sweet mushy tomatoes, when so many better things are made with tomatoes like salsa, pico de gallo, and pasta sauce. I ordered a veggie burger last night and I had to ask for the mustard. And the woman looked at me strangely when I asked and it took her a while to bring it! Doesn't ANYONE put mustard on their burgers anymore????

Not to mention the fact that my food was cold and the burger came with a side of COLD steamed broccoli with NOTHING on it. Talk about laziness on part of the chef. How hard is it to butter the broccoli just a TAD?

I mean hell, restaurants put ham in their "minestrone" soup and cheese in frickin' everything without asking-yuk!

Terror alert

Notice how we're always hearing updates from the work that intelligence agencies are doing? Today the British intelligence agency decreased their terror threat warning from critical to severe. See any issues with this? Any? First off, how is severe "better" than critical? What does severe mean? That instead of security screens at the airport they'll just let anyone on the plane? And they report it with such confidence. HOW do they know to report the terror threat level? They do it like doing the weather for crying out loud, and it's almost as accurate (or inaccurate, depending on how you look at it). I mean, we didn't have a warning before Sept. 11th happened, yet it did, didn't it?

I guess with animal, instinctual drives, whether they be violence or sex, it's the same thing. It doesn't happen if you plan hard for it, it happens when you least expect it.

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

Twins

Why is it that parents dress their twin children up alike? It's like, "Look world, we have twins! Aren't they cute?!" I mean come on, is this some special feat? Don't get me wrong, I understand that caring for twins is twice the work and stress, but it's not like conceiving them took extra work.

And, if you think about it, it's the IDENTICAL twins who are dressed up alike. What, without the same clothes we can't tell they're identical twins?? We need the same outfits to realize the kids look alike? More importantly, wouldn't the parents want to dress them up differently so that they can tell them APART from each other??

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

The airport

Depending on how you look at it, the airport is either getting more frustrating, or funnier. I thought the point of self check-in stations were to SPEED UP check-in. But noooo, we have to stand in LINE to use those machines. And I didn't even have bags to check-in, I just needed to get my boarding pass. But to do so, I had to wait in line for like 25 minutes with others who had like 20 bags each. So then what's the point of the ticket counter employees? To answer any questions on how to use the machine? Then why have the machine? Your not self checking-in anymore if you need help from someone.

So finally after checking in I go to the bathroom before boarding the plane. Now, if we're supposed to keep our bags attended at all times, then why do the bathroom doors open INTO the stall? It's a pain in the ass trying to get two carry-on bags into the small stall with me so I can pee. Now I'm no genius, but if the doors opened OUT, then we could get the bags in easier and probably reduce the line for the ladies' room.

Then, the TOPPER is that I saw an Amish couple at the airport. Anyone see anything odd about this? The Amish at the airport?? I thought they live without technology and stuff. Isn't an airplane technological? Come to think of it, if there are a lot of Amish in Pennsylvania, and if they do like to travel (this couple is an example after all), you would think we'd be seeing more wagons on our streets.

THEN road rage and traffic accidents would make more sense, because we'd have to share the road with horse-drawn wagons.

A girl's dream

Now I don't know how true this is in real life, but you hear in TV shows and movies all the time how little girls in grade school day dream about their perfect wedding, or what kids they will have, and sometimes even what they would name their kids. Is this possible? At this point girls still think boys are gross, and they're dreaming about their weddings? I mean I would think that kids of that age (who don't think to far into the future) have other things to think about.

When I was eight, my goals were getting ice cream, trying to get my parents to buy me a Cabbage Patch doll, and keeping my sister away from my toys.

Pizza slices

Have you ever wondered whose brilliant idea it was to cut pizza into squares? And then have you ever wondered WHY?? I ate a yummy pizza the other day, but the experience was less than perfect because it was cut into SQUARES. Once you get to the inside of the pizza, there's no crust to hold onto while eating, making it a more messy experience. I mean someone like me who is a messy eater as it is needs all the help she can get with keeping her fingers from drowning in sauce. And furthermore, you don't get the satisfaction of eating a pizza with the squares; it feels more like pizza when it's a triangular slice that takes a bit longer to finish (I like to nurse my food and drinks).

This is probably the stupidest thing I've seen since the Clearasil commercials trying to tell you that using the product will reduce pimples in 5 days (uh DUH, the pimples go away in about 5 days with or without the Clearasil, thank you very much).