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Top 10 ways you know that your psychology grad program has taken over your life.

10) You unload the dishwasher as a break from work.
9) When reading food labels, you look for p<.05.
8) You automatically ask your friends how they feel.
7) You process every interpersonal interaction.
6) You overuse the word process.
5) You conceptualize every character when watching a movie.
4) You soil yourself during your dissertation proposal defense.
3) You feel like punching the next person who asks you how your dissertation is coming along.
2) You feel like killing the next person who asks you when you're going to graduate.

and

1) You're convinced your advisor is responsible for the middle east conflict.

Family members,

are like allergies. You can't completely get rid of them. You can only manage them.

And cuss them out.

And they still come back.