Sunday, April 30, 2006

Gift registries

Have you ever thought about what a gift registry means? I mean, it's pretty selfish if you think about it. It's like "I'm getting married, and here's the stuff I want you to buy me." Or, "I'm having a baby and here's what I want my baby to be wearing after it's born." I mean, why should I care about your wedding or baby? Now that we live in 2006, when people are post-poning marriage and families to further their education, or choosing not to have families at all, why can't those folks have showers? I should have a "I'm going to continue to be a poor student for the next 4 years" shower. I mean hell, I need money, a laptop...but you're probably thinking "why should I care that you're going back to school?" aren't you? That's what I thought.

I had sent out a wish list to close friends and family of birthday gifts. This is the first time in many, many years that I asked for anything for my birthday. In the past I always pulled the "I just want your lovely presence, please don't bring gifts." I mean, I turned 30 this year, a milestone (not to mention I'm a poor starving student), so I wanted the celebration to be special.
But one person's nonverbals were telling me she thought it was ridiculous of me to ask for gifts. But um, last time I checked, birthdays have been associated with gifts, am I wrong? So rather than people giving me shit I wouldn't use (cuz if you haven't noticed, people who have known you for many many years still won't know what to get you), I thought I'd just let people know. Or, just get me what you can afford, and if you don't consider me to be a close friend, then don't get me anything and it's okay, my world won't fall apart. Just shut up about it. I mean jeez, gifts at a birthday party, SHOCKER.

To top all this off, when people get the gifts they registered for, they still act so surprised when they open them. You get the "Ohhh, that is sooo nice. It is so beautiful! I haven't seen anything like it, it's going to come in handy. Thank you!!"

So you didn't KNOW you might be getting that as a gift if you registered for it?? It's also funny how some folks don't want to know the sex of the baby until it's born. "We want to be surprised," they say. Surprised?? I thought that, for the most part, it can be one of two things, a boy or a girl.

You know what would be a surprise? Meeting a man who's not chicken shit.


Tim-tambolini said...

From a couple of your posts I understand that you haven't been pregnant before. Given all the problems that many people have getting pregnant and then all the problems that can occur once a woman becomes pregnant, I would consider it quite a miracle.

I also think that those people who want to be surprised by the sex of their baby are only causing themselves alot of frenzied last-minute shopping. I knew my first was a boy, and now I'm 2 months along with my second and want to know the sex ASAP.

I realize your comments are (hopefully) made in jest, and even though there are 1000's of babies born every single each parent their baby is a miracle.

Felda, Jerry Seinfeld's Biggest Fan said...

Yes Tim, it was a JOKE. :) At the same time, it's particularly irritating to hear if it's coming from someone judging a woman for not wanting kids. Got me?

Tim-tambolini said...

I would be the last person to judge a woman for not wanting kids. I was always the woman saying I wasn't going to have children, but finally did just weeks before my 31st birthday. Somedays I wish I had made a different decision and as I sit here, pregnant again (this time on purpose), I still wonder if I know what I'm doing.

There is much freedom when you don't have children and I envy it and am not, despite what my last comment might have made you think, one of those women who can only talk about their child. Those women are from yawnsville!!